KarkatXVigilante!Reader:Smooth CriminalP1

Lets face the facts, okay. You live in the state of New York City. You weren't special. You weren't that unique little snowflake that stands out in the crowd like everyone always told you while you were growing up. You are the exact same as everyone else.

It used to bother you. It used to piss you the hell off, but you soon learned that that is only the truth by the light of day.

By night time, you weren't yourself any longer. You were someone else, someone you have yet to name, but truth be told, you didn't feel a need to give your alter ego a cool name like "Batman" or "Green Lantern". It was best to remain anonymous. It was fun keeping every wondering citizen in the shadows as they search for weeks on end, trying to figure out the mystery of the boy/girl in the masquerade mask.

You were a girl, by the way, not that you could tell anyone that without being dismissed to the side like dust.

Again, not that you minded, you were the girl in the masquerade mask after all, and you had a lot of fun laughing at peoples feeble attempts at trying to catch you and possibly put you behind bars for doing the authority's job without permission. But the odds of them ever finding out who you really are were one in a million.

Before you were just an amateur, but now your an expert in your profession, you knew that it was too risky to leave any of your things laying around for anyone to find, especially since you have a crabby roommate who hates when you leave your shit on the ground for him to step on. Even though he does the exact same thing all the time!

Karkat makes you flip your lid sometimes, but you knew in your head that you were more awesome that him and all his other friends combined! You prevented thousands of death and crimes all the time, despite not being able to tell them that. They didn't need to know why you were awesome, you knew it, and as far as you were concerned, that was plenty of people who knew!

What increased you awesomeness as well, was that you didn't just have one boring mask you wore all the time, that would be to easy! In fact, you have a collection of them stashed away where no one can find them. They were all kept in a safe high up in your closet that no one was aware of. It contained all your nightly essentials like your masks, your capes, and even all of your weapons.

It was fun really, it definitely made up for all the boring days you spend here at home listening to your roommates constant whining and complaining.

"Eeeh, waaaahh, I can't find my favowite wom com! Waaaah, my wife is soo hard! Boo hoo!" you would tease him when you got really fed up.

"Well flash back motherfucker! There are starving children in third world countries so why don't you actually take time and be thankful for the things you have!"

Yeah no, it wasn't the light hearted making fun of him type of thing. It was stuff you would say that came from your goddamn heart and soul.

You always viewed Karkat as selfish and immature, you almost hated him to an extent. The way he would whine when he never got what he wanted. Of course you did exhaggerate a bit when you said 'whine' because he didn't really wine, but with him complaining all the time, it sounded like whining after a while. And frankly, you were sick of it.

But, at the same time, you would be lying if you said that you didn't like the brunette boy at least just a little. Of course you weren't head over heels for him or anything, nor would you ever be with someone like that, or even remotely similar to him. But if the option ever occured, you would go out with him, but nothing too serious. If that ever did happen, which you doubt it ever will, no big commitment would be made, no marriage, no kids, nothing past the innocent kiss on the lips, or cuddling some night in the same bed.

Of course, there is always that part of you that imagines more vivid and tempting fantasies that you would never act upon or mention to anybody. But that was the irrational part of your brain that liked to fuck up your sense of rationality completely. But enough about that.

Speaking of which, here comes Karkat again, emerging from his dungeon of a room, probably nerding out on World of Warcraft or something. But you didn't have a right to make fun of him for that really, you play online RPG's sometimes, since Karkat and his friends are big on role playing for some reason. You didn't have anything against it of course. It just gets old after a while, especially when you could be out in the real world, doing all the things that do in their imagination.

Karkat had came in rather ungracefully, tripping over a few random things on the ground, while you were at the kitchen counter unwrapping a big mac that you had gotten from Mcdonalds. It's not something you did often, but your stomach had told you that it needed food, and it needed it now! So at the moment, you didn't care how unhealthy it was. You moaned quietly as the heavenly taste reached your taste buds, and in that moment, you swore a chubby baby angel was playing a harp right above your head as golden sparkles from heaven rained down on you.

Karkat on the other hand, looked like he had just woken up. his hair was as crazy as ever, and his lips were turned down in a frown that everyone had gotten used to. You couldn't imagine why he would just be waking up, it was six in the evening after all!

Karkat smelled what you were eating, and walked over to where you were, curious. You brushed him off, and started ambling on over to the television to visit your best friend, also known as Netflix, also known as your savior.

"Did you get anything else?" he asked in his usual, low, raspy and gruff voice. You didn't so much as look at him while you searched for something interesting to watch. You were stuck between a happy sitcom, to a total jaw dropping drama.

"No." you answered him finally. "I'm not your mommy, you can get your own food." you said plainly. He only grunted in response, but he felt a twinge of pain somewhere deep in his hateful heart. He didn't let you know that though, just another reason to make him feel like his problems don't matter. That was all he got from your little lectures you gave him about being thankful for the things he has, and how he should work towards the things he doesn't, that he wanted instead of pouting about them.

His problems didn't matter.

Thats not how you meant it at all though, you were trying to say something, but apparently he had the mentallity of a six year old and couldn't comprehend what you were really trying to say.